Do You Have A Secret?

All of us have secrets. Right?

Yes, we do.

In research conducted by Dr. Katie Greenway from the School of Psychological Sciences at the University of Melbourne, she says that we are holding on to 17 secrets at any one time.

That's a lot of secrets!

How does it affect us to hold on to what might be considered to be so much baggage?

Dr. Greenway says, "Secrecy permeates all aspects of our lives. It's a big part of our work and personal lives." 

There are big secrets and small secrets, each one having a different effect on us emotionally.

A positive secret could be because you are planning a surprise for someone.

There are times when a friend may share intimate secrets with you, which is a sign of trust and strengthens the bond you have with each other.

I know when I was drinking most of the time some years ago, my standard practice was to downplay the amount and the effects of the behaviour on my life.

Research shows holding on to secrets can harm stress levels.  We take on the secret, and it rolls around in our mind, and we fixate on it, which creates tension and stress.

Dr. Greenways' research found people entrusted with secrets felt less happy, had less relationship satisfaction, felt weighed down, and found tasks took more effort to complete.

What secrets are you holding on to that might be affecting you?

How can you let them go without harming someone?

I think the words by author Alley Carter are appropriate for this discussion,

"I thought about how there are two types of secrets: the kind you want to keep in and the kind you don't dare to let out."

Namaste